Kicking & Screaming

I know that whenever something great is about to happen to or for me, I’m going to get extremely sleepy. About a day or two before, when I should be preparing for that great moment or opportunity, I feel too exhausted to do anything and go into hiding. That way, when the “big day” comes, I am ill-prepared and more likely to back out. Sounds odd, right? Or, maybe something like this happens to you. It’s rare, but it’s a way of resisting change and fighting against something positive happening in your life. One of my earlier mentors would always joke and say to me, “you’re gonna kick and scream your way to the bank, aren’t you”. And I guess, in a way, he was right because my fear and resistance shows up like clockwork.

For those of us who are used to things not going as we hope, it’s common for our minds and sometimes our bodies to be resistant to something good. For some, resistance comes in the form of distraction — one minute you’re on the verge of a breakthrough, and then you grab your phone to look at the cute puppy feed on Instagram. Maybe it’s not distraction, but another form of self-sabotage, like making excuses, procrastination, or negative thoughts. I know of a few people who get physically sick when they are on the brink of expansion. However resistance tends to show up for you, please know that it is not wrong. But do take note of it when it happens, and what you’re doing or working on. It’s a sign that you’re on the right track.

Thankfully, now I’m at the place where if I feel that exhaustion, I smile to myself because I know I’m growing and on to something great, and I push myself through it. So, you see, it’s really about re-framing what you perceive as a threat. Re-framing what you view as a negative response. Redefining fear. Is it possible that your mind & body is simply having trouble processing new information? Is it possible that it thinks it’s protecting you from the unknown? If so, is that “wrong”? Part of breaking through and interrupting patterns, is deciding to look at fear and resistance as a great thing. Why? Because it is a clue that you are on the brink of expansion. Why not celebrate that?

If you do decide to celebrate your resistance, it will soon fade away. Maybe it will be replaced by something new one day, maybe it won’t. But today, you get to choose how you respond. Today, you get to choose to interrupt your patterns. Today, you get to befriend your fears. Today, you get to choose to keep going. Today, you get to choose YOU.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It’s not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”  — Marianne Williamson

Get out and show the world who you are. I believe in you.